A resume is an important professional artifact but it doesn’t actually tell anyone much about the real person whose milestones and details it lists, in a depressingly antiseptic fashion. So, I thought I would share a bit about who I really am, what’s important to me, and what you get when you see me IRL. In, out, nobody gets hurt.
- I was born in Detroit, Michigan; and moved to Chicago (suburbs) 6 weeks later. After that, I lived in Orange County, California (before it was weird); Chicago (those damn suburbs, again); Bloomington, Indiana; London, England; Cuenca, Ecuador; and Envigado, Colombia (some people consider it part of Medellín); with short stints in Zurich, Switzerland; Melbourne, Australia; Herefordshire, UK; Breda, The Netherlands; Prague, Czech Republic; and Vancouver, British Columbia.
- I currently live in Envigado, Colombia, and what I love most about my town are the people. While I have met a lot of amazing people around the world, the people of Medellín are far and away the most demonstrably friendly people I have ever come across. They are sooooo friendly, you actually don’t notice how much their beloved arepas are strangely reminiscent of hockey pucks.
- Even though I live in South America, my Spanish is dreadful. There are two very good reasons for this: When I lived in Ecuador, everyone always wanted to practice English (or possibly avoid having to listen to a gringa accent) and because I am in school all day, every day, learning in English. Estas excusas son poco convincentes, lo sé.
- While my Spanish is wanting, I am able to mime “breadcrumbs” in Swiss German.
- I solo traveled around the globe 1 1/2 times with one carry-on and a backpack small enough to be a personal item. Never underestimate the value of packing light.
- I’ve traveled to 35 countries: USA, Canada, Mexico, Argentina, Peru, Colombia, Uruguay, Venezuela, Ecuador, Jamaica, Martinique, Saint Martin, Grenada, BVI, Barbados, Curaçao, Vietnam, Malaysia, United Arab Emirates, Turkey, Ireland, Scotland, England, Wales, France, Italy, Austria, Czechia, Poland, Hungary, Slovakia, Germany, The Netherlands, Belgium, Australia. I never seem to get to the tourist sites in any place I land but I have definite eaten with the locals in virtually every destination.
- I was in Istanbul, Turkey, when Pokémon GO launched, and I am nerdy enough to have played. That night there was a military coup. The next day I deleted my account because it felt frivolous to have been playing a game when violence was brewing. Ignorance is never as bliss-y as they say.
- The most rewarding part of traveling around the world, was housesitting. I stayed in an adobe house on a Native American reservation; on a First Nation reservation in British Columbia; and in a couple of bucolic hamlets in rural England, where I was often invited to tea at the neighbors but was never actually served or offered tea during any of those visits. I did have many beers, a few Scotches, and entirely too much Christmas cake for one human.
- When I applied for PhD programs, each of the schools required a whole slew of quantitative classes before I officially started the programs because of my lifelong avoidance of math. I figured I should take those classes at the best institution I could get into instead of just checking them off at any old school. Babson it was — where I not only earned a solid A in every quant class I took, I graduated valedictorian. Never assume you “aren’t good at something.”
- My most common nickname is Ellie; my personal favorite nickname is my DJ name, Vitamin E; and my most creative (and accurate) nickname is “Typo Mary.” Since nothing on this website was edited by anyone else, please excuse the typos (and I hope they aren’t contagious)!
- My karaoke song is Telephone Line by ELO. I am not much of a karaoke-r but when I do, it’s ELO all the way, baby.
- My favorite author is Isak Dinesen (Karen Blixen) and I even named my first dog Babette for her novel Babette’s Feast. I was also mom to three other dogs, Ralph, Chloe, & Scout; cats Buddha and Princess Pea; and a bunch of chickens with chicken-y names like Pot Pie, Drumstick, Dumpling.
- Regarding those chickens, I used to have a small flock in my Chicago backyard, where I also had a three-season hoop house for growing vegetables. Eventually the front yard was given over to food as well and neighbors would come by to harvest herbs and even vegetables when the harvest was too much for one single lady to consume.
- I joke that I am a 12-year-old boy in a middle-aged lady body. I am not sure how that happened but there’s something to say for jumping in puddles and playing zombie basketball.
- I was lucky enough to eat Paul Kahan’s food multiple times a week, for years — as a job. It ruined me for all restaurants everywhere. But I still enjoy me a nosh from a good food cart.
- The person who convinced me to get my sommelier certificate was my dad’s brain surgeon. Oddest moment during my wine studies: Belinda Chang telling me to dump a handful of actual grass into a sauvignon blanc to learn about “grassy notes.” It worked, but don’t try it at home.
- I blogged everyday back in the day when I was building my first technology company, RIA. Blogging every day sucks as much as you think. Now I make sure to read books everyday instead.
- After years of amassing connections, when I finally accepted I had semi-retired, I deleted my Twitter and Instagram profiles and then on FB I deleted everyone I didn’t actually know. I had to start some social media accounts for MBA classes but I keep on purposely forgetting the passwords so don’t follow me.
- I’ve been wonderfully blessed with a gaggle of of spectacular girlfriends who are scattered on a few different continents — they are, each of them, the kind of friend you can not talk to for years and when you finally get back together, the conversation just picks up where it left off. Oh, and we all still look the same no matter how much time has passed.
- When I did the deal with AB-InBev that closed the startup founder chapter of my life, I was in Australia, so I always had to call into the negotiations with the army of AB lawyers at 2am, me in my PJs and them in their suits. The trauma from this experience is one of the reasons I chose to settle in South America — it’s the same time zone as the US!
- I love to hike, especially solo, and would love to have a chunk of time to do a thru-hike. I’ve got my sights set on the Greater Patagonian Trail, which is still just coming together and so isn’t really an official thru-hike as much as a general idea of a path that requires much trust in the universe. Also, this has to wait until after my ortho doctor, The Bone Ninja, saws my legs in half.
- I like to wild camp and always think it is hilarious when some grouchy landowner shakes my tent to wake me up the morning after I squatted on their land and then stares dumbfounded when a middle-aged single lady pops her gray-haired head out to say “hola!”
- I swam competitively throughout my entire youth, raced bikes in college, and ran the Chicago marathon after college. That said, I’ve never done a triathlon. Right now, my jam is recurve archery.
- I’m probably the least nostalgic person you’ll ever meet. While I love and appreciate all the adventures and people and ideas I’ve encountered in life, I tend to look forward instead of back.
- What’s consuming me right now is Gardeners of the Galápagos Initiative, the dream of installing and maintaining a data, analytics, and AI infrastructure on the archipelago with the dual purpose of increasing scientific research opportunities and developing interactive, engaging data-driven content for education, engagement, and fundraising.
So, That’s Me. Get it touch: ellen@ellenmalloy.com.